Still waiting you

I'd travel to past, my cat is lost since april this year, I miss him so freaking much, he was like my best friend, I can't treat him otherwise, he was not just an animal, he was my partner and my tears tissue, without him I feel a little empty and lost, that's how much crucial he was for me.

I'd go to past summer, any summer, and lay in the garden with him even if i'm sweating and dying of heat. I'd sleep beside him and pet his head and tummy all day, hear his purr and meow, count his scars, give him all the seafood I could afford and he could eat, spending the days with him and not letting him go like that, just vanishing.

 

I'd like to stay there forever, impede him go away, staying by his side till he die, here, with me, not alone, not in who knows where, how, when. Keep him with me, that's why I would go to past. But I dont regret anything, my life with him was full of love, food and cuddles. I loved him with every part of my soul, I still do. I still wait for him, it's less painful, less grievous than give up, than thinking of him died. I still hold on. Maybe he's alive, I can't know and I can't be sure. I just really hope he come back.